TV Jots

Newcomers Ain’t No Lex

Well, last night during the eight-season premiere, we finally got to see the revamped Smallville, minus former Day One regulars Michael Rosenbaum as tortured, increasingly diabolical gazillionaire Lex Luthor and Kristin Kreuk as fair, increasingly annoying girl next door Lana Lang.

In their place, roughly, we have new villainess Tess Mercer, played by recent cast addition Cassidy Freeman, and the return of Green Arrow/Oliver Queen, played by Justin Hartley, the only guy in the world who looks good in vibrant green pleather or tights or whatever his get-up is made of. Neither comes close to restoring the series’ urgency in the absence of the lone villain who previously made Smallville worth watching from week to week, meaning Rosenbaum’s Lex, of course.

So, aside from longtime fans not being able to get over the departure of a central, integral character — note I don’t mention Kreuk’s Lana because we knew from the get-go she’d have to go eventually to make room for Superboy’s fated love Lois Lane), did the season opener “Odyssey” work?

Not for me. Everything was too convenient, resulting in an episode that seemed contrived and flat when you add up all the parts. Throw in Mercer/Freeman’s ridiculously expressionless face (if she were older, I’d wonder if she’d overdone the Botox), which seems to have slight variations of only one setting, blank/stare/glare, and the effect is complete.

I’ve got many questions on my mind. For instance, I can buy Chloe losing her power to heal, but where did the superhuman intelligence come from? Yes, she’s always been smart and, better still, cunning. But why such a broad ability, completely unrelated to healing, emerging just as the big Baddie is trying to track down the individual Justice League members? Convenient, no?

And why, oh, why would Clark just stand still and allow Oliver to shoot him not once, but twice with his poisoned arrows? I suppose because that’s what the plot required to move along to the desired conclusion, namely a trip to the sun and restored alien-ness. In that case, it’s doubly convenient that Chloe couldn’t heal him herself on the spot, in which case Clark would’ve most likely been plain old human again.

So, sure, all of the many expedient plot twists help wrap everything up in a pretty bow, but they also make the viewing experience quite boring and unsatisfying in my opinion. Smallville has got to do better than this as Season Eight unfolds. Throw us a truly shocking surprise or something every now and then, will ya.

The Verdict: C